Philippians 4:13

I was talking to a friend yesterday about recognizing how much things change and how much people grow.  That it's neat to be able to look back and see where I was in life compared to where I am now.  We were speaking specifically of "church stuff" and I mentioned that a year ago, I wasn't sure what my calling was and how quiet and reserved I was.  I was looking today though and realized that that wasn't even a year ago!  I wrote a blog in late July about starting to take the first steps to get more involved and work towards what I thought God was calling me to do.  It's only been 7 months since I decided to step outside my comfort zone and get more involved.  It's been some of the happiest months of my life.

It's interesting to look back and be able to relive how nervous and insecure I was.  Every single time I've said, "Oh no, I don't think I'd be very good at that." God sends someone into my life to encourage me to try.  Someone that gives me support and encouragement to step past what I think I can do and trust in what God knows I can do through Him.  Even when I don't excel in something, it loopholes into something great.  Sure, I didn't do so great at (insert all kinds of things here), but I met someone in the process who is a wonderful addition to my path in life that I may not have met otherwise.  Or after realizing that I'm not good at (insert even more things here) I was able to more clearly understand why I'm better at those other things.  There's always a silver lining.  There's always that blessing in disguise.

I've found myself so hungry for more.  I spent so much of my life and my walk with Christ sitting on the side lines.  I never wanted to do this, that or the other because I believed I wasn't enough.  I'm not smart enough, strong enough, friendly enough, social enough, talented enough.  And maybe I'm not - but God is.  So fine, I'm not smart enough?  Then I want to read the Bible more and ask more questions so that I can learn.  I'm not strong enough?  Then I'll learn from my experiences and draw strength instead of wallowing in negativity.  I'm not friendly or social enough?  Then I'll step outside my comfort zone and force myself into situations where I have no other choice but to be the things I want to be.  When I stop relying on what I think I can do and, instead, trust and rely on what God knows I can do through Him - what He created me to be - that's when amazing things happen.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" - Philippians 4:13

This year I'm continuing to submit.  To lean not on my own understanding, to submit to God in all things and allow Him to make my path straight.  Because He will.  Because He has and He is.  If this has been the change I see in only the last 7 months, I can't wait to see where I am in another year from now.  Another 5 years from now.  I sat stagnant for way too long.